Parent’s struggle – The other side of the coin

Sometimes, we think how lucky our parents are. They can do anything they want without any body’s permission, spend however they want and never have to obey or request someone. But is this true?

Seeing my post about how the education pressure affects the teenagers, my uncle asked, ‘why not write a post about how it affects the parents?’ So, I really thought about it. And here it is .
The side of coin from our parent’s view.

If there is a person having more pressure than the teenager, then it is being the parent of the teenager. That is one job that is the hardest one and one doesn’t even get paid for it. Imagine a person, who was once just like us, have to guide us from right and wrong, from bad and good, shape us into good adults with morals and virtues. I mean, when we can’t even keep our pens and pencils properly, our parents have to make us into good, responsible and successful adults. It is a lot of pressure, especially in today’s world where learning bad things is just a click away.

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Their each and every minute is spent for the well being for us. They devote all their thoughts for us. They really want us to be happy and it is our happiness that makes them happy. When was the last time you remember your parents doing something for themselves and not for the benefit of family?

I know. They sometimes do scold at us and shout at us. But if we think properly, the reason behind the scolding would be us. We might have really done something wrong. And if it wasn’t our fault at all, understand that they too are under pressure, just like us or even more, and we would have annoyed them at that crucial moment. But trust me, if it wasn’t our fault and we had got the scolding that day, then our parents would feel more bad than we would.

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If studying is a huge pressure for us, then imagine they have to work, meet the satisfaction of their boss, guide the family, meet the family’s needs, teach their kids, see to their needs, aka demands. take care of their parents and meet their requirements, take care of family expense and education expense, pay income tax, etc, etc, etc..

If writing and reading all these takes this much time then think, how our parents manage it? We know being a teenager isn’t a piece of cake. But then, if we can’t manage ourselves, think how difficult it will be for our parents to manage us and all this stuff above? On top this, we keep complaining to them, ‘this is not done, that is not done, she/he has this, I don’t have this, I don’t want this’, etc, etc.

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They have this huge responsibility of guiding us. There can be no one happier than a parent seeing their child prosper. Sometimes, we, teenager, need to put ourselves in their shoes. We want our parents to satisfy our needs but do we even think about their needs?

Education pressure has made it’s impact on parents too. They want us to succeed and in today’s world, being the good student is important. Therefore, our parents are asking us to put our best effort.

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It is high time we learn that this world is not only changing for us but for them too. When they grew up, things were different and they were brought up differently. They didn’t have Internet, mobile phones(let alone smart phones), TV, cars, social media, etc. But now, in this world, with so many new innovations and inventions, our parents are also figuring their way out to bring us up with good morals and principles. If they say no to mobile phones or TV or Internet, it is not because they don’t want you to enjoy or be happy. It is because you can learn many other unnecessary, unwanted and bad things which may have serve consequences. We must always respect them and their decisions.

Remember that they too have been teenagers and they know what a teenager goes through at this age, maybe not fully but enough to have an idea. So, respect their decisions and know that anything they say is coming from experience, knowledge and wisdom.

Being a parent of a teenager is harder than being a teenager.

Nivashini Muthuvel

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The Education Pressure

Not many might know, but there is this movie called “3 idiots” which I saw when I was 10 years old. Kinda of 6 years back. The movie was about how today’s education is and the pressure it has on students. I loved that movie not because it was about student’s problems but because it was very funny and amusing. When you are 10 years old and you are watching a movie, all you care about is how much you laughed through the movie. But now, when I came across that movie again, I saw how my world became exactly the way the movie portrayed it. And the movie became more than a movie to me. 

Suddenly, I realized just like those many students in that movie, I am running a race where I must be first or I will get trampled. This realization was a nightmare. 

I mean, your whole life depends on how you are in these teenage years. Just thinking of this will make us faint. I mean, if how well we will be is decided by these four years of teenage, then how will we feel good, happy and relaxed? People need to understand that we are still learning and we still make mistakes. We, teenagers, go through a lot of emotions more than adults or kids do. Because we are adults as well as kids. We need to act as the kid sometimes and as the adult sometimes. Try being a teenager, then you will know. And now imagine, that your whole life is based on these and only these 4 years of teenage.

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People should learn to stop putting pressure on us. I mean, without anybody telling us, we know how much is at stake if we don’t study well. The pressure just gets higher if one keeps mentioning to us about how important it is to study well. We understand. 

We do understand that all want only good things to happen to us. But instead of making us yearn for the good things that will come after we study well, some people just keep talking about what would happen if  we don’t study well. And some say they don’t care if we don’t score good, but do they really mean it? Are they really okay if we don’t score well? 


Education is for us to learn. And our marks are just an indication of how much we know. But today’s world is so screwed up that our marks only decide who we are. Not our behavior, our character, our other skills or our attitude. All of us are suddenly running in this race where getting 95% above is crucial for our survival. If each and every one yearns for this 95% above, then think how much competition this generation has. Education is not the way it used to be. It is different now. We have the same prestige’s colleges we had 50 years, or even 100 years ago, but the number of students are increasing every day and each day a student breaks a record of scoring the highest score. Therefore, these colleges keep raising their bar for their seats. But no new colleges come.

So, people need to understand that we are trying our best in this world. It is not easy. We are still trying to figure the balance for having some fun and at the same time making sure we have a good life for the next 40 years. I mean, it is not like you get to be a teenage all the time. Only these 6  years one gets to be a teenager. So, we are trying to make the most of it. 

And we are still struggling. Being a teenager in this world is not an easy job at all. You are literally fighting for your place in this world and it is like trying to find a seat to sit in a train when you don’t even have place to breathe properly. That cramped it is. Putting more pressure on us make it even more difficult to concentrate. I mean, only when we feel relaxed and happy, we can do our best. If we feel so anxious, worried and suffocated all the time, how can we score?  Only when we feel good about ourselves, we can do good in everything. And the lifestyle in our world today is more than enough to ensure us when know what happens when we don’t study well.

All I can hope is that the coming generation need not fight for their place in this world like we do. I hope they get the place they deserve to get without any of this struggle and fight. 


Lots of love, 

Nivashini Muthuvel.

Getting the marks back

Getting back the marks can really increase one’s heartbeat. Teenagical proven. Especially by me. 


          Sometimes, these situations are really stressful that all you want to do is burn the room that contains all these answers and question papers. But it is okay, these are just phases of our school life. You never know, but you might find it funny when you grow up and tell everyone about how much you fussed about your marks. 

        At times, it might feel like the whole sky has fallen on us when we get very less marks( maybe not that serious but you get the idea). I know the expectations of my parents and teachers. I just cant help but feel lost and hopeless when I realize that I didn’t fulfill them. But today, I also realized that many think and feel just like me. 


        But it is okay. We feel like this because of one thing, our own inferiority complex.

We just keep thinking I can’t do it, I will fail, I will lose. But it is at these crucial moments you must give support and hope to yourself even if none does.

One of these crucial moments for a teenager is getting back the marks, trust me. You need to think you can do it. You will do it. Just don’t think of the past but the future.

“What starts here changes the world.”

Unless and until you believe in yourself, you can’t do it. You wouldn’t have done it not because it was hard, tough or difficult, but you didn’t believe in yourself. Our struggles in this world are similar and the lessons to overcome those struggles and to move forward—changing ourselves and the world around us—will apply equally to all. 

                Sometimes, your hard work may not pay right off. But don’t ever give up. You should never. Try studying with more confidence and plan your study timetable. Know where you are weak. Try to improve in that area. I did and I have improved. Also, you will really like the response you got when you get good marks that you will continue to keep it up.  


               Nothing is too late. If not in this exam, you can do it in the next one. All you need is the spark. And you can find that spark only in what you like and inspire.

There is always enough time for us. Just know how to use it. You can always achieve what you want if you really want it.  There is still tomorrow.

 Nivashini Muthuvel